Public Conveniences in North Staffordshire Causing a Stink

In recent years, we have seen the closing of public conveniences throughout North Staffordshire which has rendered the general public (when out and about) struggling to find a clean and appropriate public toilet. This is in light of the fact that IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome) and urinary disorders (such as an overactive bladder) are on the increase amongst local people. This renders many, when venturing out, having to pre-plan their route around toilet facilities accordingly, such are the debilitating effects of FGID (Functional Gastrointestinal Disorder), Crohn’s disease, Colitis and many more serious bowel conditions that need an immediate remedy when outdoors.

That said, the majority of the public conveniences on offer in Stoke-on-Trent and Newcastle-under-Lyme are an appalling disgrace. Even in light of the fact that we have just been through a major pandemic (Covid 19), coupled with the lurking winter encroachment (where those who do not wash their hands after using public conveniences could be passing on infections). That is why it’s imperative that all hand-washing taps in public toilets are non-touch and automatic.

Shockingly this is not the case even amongst latrines owned by multi-million-pound store owners like Tesco, Morrisons, Asda and Sainsbury’s (the latter of which is currently one of the worst offenders). In short, it is the richest and most powerful of our institutions that are creating everyday public health hazards for the general public. In fact, they are too tight fisted to upkeep and modernise their closets even for loyal paying customers that spend a large portion of their income in their stores.

Below are marks out of ten for the most popular (or unpopular as the case may be) conveniences in Stoke-on-Trent and Newcastle-under-Lyme.

Newcastle-under-Lyme Public toilets Hassell Street (beside Newcastle bus station) 1/10

I mean, what can any honest person say about this decrepit urine-soaked hovel which shoppers are forced to use when visiting Newcastle town centre (pictured). This disgraceful ‘public ‘convenience’ ‘maintained’ by the council has a dirty dank feel about the place, featuring decaying and encrusted hand taps which are so soiled you would be afraid that you would pick something up just by touching them. Don’t take my word for it, go see for yourselves. You can bet your bottom dollar that the local councillors/politicians don’t use it as their thrones, so why do they expect their constituents to? What is even more stomach-churning is that it has been in this decaying state years.

Longton Market Toilets 7/10

Passable, and not an unduly horrific or degrading experience like the others described, but there’s always room for improvement you know.

Sainsbury’s in both Stoke and Newcastle 1/10

It’s strange that although miles apart, the toilets inside Sainsbury’s in both Stoke and Newcastle harbour the same ineluctable putrid reek (it isn’t the whiff of scented rose petals let me tell you). Such a similar rotten egg come ammonia like odour in both store complexes, prevalent for years, could suggest that the drains are not maintained. In addition, in-store in Stoke, the disabled toilet has been locked for months if not years.

Morrisons Public toilets, Goose Street Newcastle 3/10

Morrisons has very poor standards of hygiene in their public toilets nationwide, even though they are largely a food store. You don’t feel safe touching anything inside their filthy little huts. We know that feeling when something/or somewhere just isn’t clean. The only slight exception is the toilets in Morrisons on Festival Park (6/10), which are of better hygiene standards than their standardised store loos nationwide.

Asda, Tunstall 4/10

Empty and dingy WC which nearly always reeks of number twos. It’s therefore wise to hold your breath as you enter and exit as quickly as possible before you breathe in too much of the rank air. Not forgetting of course if you are desperate and have to sit down, line the seat with loo roll.

Potteries Shopping Centre, Hanley 8/10

I would rate this convenience the cleanest and most hygienic in North Staffordshire. No touch taps and always in a reasonably good, sanitised condition, which renders you feeling as clean going out as you did when you went in.

Tesco, Hanley and Longton 3/10

The Hanley Tesco store toilets leave a lot to be desired, with poor standards of cleanliness, the only saving grace for both the Tesco store toilets is that they both feature non-touch taps.

The Longton toilets inside the Tesco store, just next to the café, which is currently being renovated, a pungent acrid ammonia smell suffocates your every being. Tesco have got their priorities in order, renovate the money-making café but leave where the customers have to spend a penny ponging – the customers won’t know how to complain.

Meanwhile, the Tesco toilets in Hanley are nearly always permeating a sickly faeces-like stench, coupled with multiple little puddles on the floor below the urinals (which you will no doubt traipse back into your home if you don’t remove your shoes at your door).

Hanley Bus Station Toilets 4/10

This dark and grubby inhospitable convenience has no touchless taps, so always carry alcohol spray/lotion if you inadvertently touch any of the grimy looking faucets including any door handles.

Hanley Market 6.5/10

Not bad, but not on par with the convenience on the top floor of the same building (Potteries Shopping Centre).

Stoke-on-Trent Railway Station Toilets 6.5/10

Average or slightly above average hygienically. Although there are rest rooms on both platforms 1 and 2, equipped with non-touch sensor taps, one still would not relish the ‘sitting down experience’.